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Saturday, January 9, 2010

Post # 67 - War on Spam: Jorge and the Corpse - 9/12/2009

Subject: I need you to get back to me {{Urgent}!
Date: Sat, 12 Sep 2009 03:58:54 -0700

Dear Friend,

I am the confidant of the Ex-President of the Ecuador (President Lucio Gutierrez) who was recently removed from power and presently granted Political asylum in Brazil with strict instruction not to leave Brazil. You can see links below:

He has secretly informed me to seek for a genuine and kind hearted person who will be able to claim and invest the sum of $43.5Million United States Dollars which he had secretly deposited with a private financial organization before the incident that resulted in his fleeing for asylum. The new Government is trying all efforts to seize all funds that belong to the former President Lucio Gutierrez. Your assistance in now needed to lay claim to this funds since it was deposited in the name of a "Foreign Partner” Fictitious. I personally will not be able to handle such transaction now since I am still a serving Officer in the country's army but as a confidant of the former President Lucio Gutierrez, I am ready to help him seek for help.

I request that you provide me with your full names, contact address, Occupation, telephone and fax numbers and once this information is received I will provide you with the necessary and relevant documents that will put you in place as the original owner of the money. Mr. Lucio has already instructed that 85% of this money will be for him while the remaining 15% will be for you and I can assure that the transaction is risk free.

Upon your response, I will introduce you to an attorney who will provide you with guidelines and assistance too. For now I will suggest that all correspondence should be via Email for purely security reasons and no doubt this proposal will make you apprehensive.

Please, I employ you to observe utmost confidentiality and be rest assured that this transaction would be most profitable for both of us because we shall require your assistance to invest our share in your country.

Your timely response will be awaited
Mr. Jorge Arroyo
My response, 9/12/09

Hey Jorge,

I think I may know your mom. We dated in high school. She was popular. That was a LONG time ago. If you would, please pass along my good wishes.

I see you need my help. I need your help as well.

My name is Juan Don Julio Sanchez. I am on the lam. I killed a cowboy just for snoring too loud. Before you judge me, he was snoring REALLY REALLY loud. And someone put too much codeine in my cough syrup.

I mauled him with a frozen ham. Then, when the police came to "ask me a few questions" we had a nice ham dinner. Now I just need getting rid of the body. Can I mail you some "parts", one at a time? I want to start with the left thumb, then right index toe (I call it the pointer), and then the spleen. We'll just keep this up until you have all of Pablo. Keep only the parts you want, cancel at any time.

You seeked for the right person. I am both a) genuine and b) kind-hearted. Here is my info:

1) Full Names: Juan Don Julio Sanchez
2) 43 Wretched Disaster Lane, Malevolence, CO 56665
3) Occupation: Cowboy/Outlaw
4) Telephone: My phone was smashed by the frozen ham when I was mauling Pablo.
5) Fax Number: People in Los Estados Unidos don't really use faxes anymore. Or VCR's.

Please respond. I need the cash to live a life on the run from the lawman.


Juan Don Julio Sanchez


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