Dear Axe,
I like the ladies. I go out of my way to attract them. I wear fancy shoes. I buy silk sheets. I drive fast cars. I had some enhancements done. I have a fancy hair cut. When I go to bars and clubs, I drink expensive martinis with expensive vodkas that I really don’t like. I took dance classes to learn some moves. I keep a change of clothes and a toothbrush in my trunk in case “I get lucky”. I think I’m a player.
I’ve seen your ads. Your products attract the chicks. My god you can tell from the commercials. A spray here (chest) plus a spray here (pits) gets you here (hot chicks).
Here’s the deal. I’m a dis-satisfied customer. A spray here plus a spray here gets me hit on by dudes. Twice now. One was my math teacher from middle school.
I think something might be wrong with my Axe Body Spray. In your defense, it’s one of the newer scents. Maybe you rushed this one to the market prematurely, and didn’t notice the dude rats hitting on the other dude rats.
If you’d like, I can send the unused portion for evaluation and testing. Be careful though—if you get some on you, you may turn into Ned Beatty in those backwoods on the Chattahoochee River.
Let me know!
Thanks.
Jerry
--------------------------------
From: comments@unilever.com
Date: Thu, 6 May 2010 13:17:29 -0400
Subject: Axe Consumer Services Case #: 7540483
Dear Jerry,
Thank you for writing us regarding Axe Deodorant Bodyspray.
The AXE campaign is meant to be a humorous look at the "dating game" and the desire of young men to be noticed by young women. We hope you'll understand the campaign is meant to be an exaggerated example of the wishful thinking of many young men. Keep in mind smelling good is only half the battle; the rest is really up to you.
Sincerely,
Your friends at Axe
-------------------------------------
To: comments@unilever.com
Subject: FW: Axe Consumer Services Case #: 7540483
Date: Thu, 6 May 2010 21:49:38 -0400
Dear Friends at Axe,
I can understand why you artfully dodged the “return the unused portion” option. I can’t say I blame you. This stuff must give off the wrong pheromones. If you get some on you, you’ll be the one attracting all of the dudes.
I accidentally spilled a little on my shorts before having dinner at the local diner. My gosh the phone numbers.
I’m going to keep buying. Clearly this stuff works. If I catch a “hetero” bottle one of these times, I’m gonna be in business.
Thanks,
Jerry
I like the ladies. I go out of my way to attract them. I wear fancy shoes. I buy silk sheets. I drive fast cars. I had some enhancements done. I have a fancy hair cut. When I go to bars and clubs, I drink expensive martinis with expensive vodkas that I really don’t like. I took dance classes to learn some moves. I keep a change of clothes and a toothbrush in my trunk in case “I get lucky”. I think I’m a player.
I’ve seen your ads. Your products attract the chicks. My god you can tell from the commercials. A spray here (chest) plus a spray here (pits) gets you here (hot chicks).
Here’s the deal. I’m a dis-satisfied customer. A spray here plus a spray here gets me hit on by dudes. Twice now. One was my math teacher from middle school.
I think something might be wrong with my Axe Body Spray. In your defense, it’s one of the newer scents. Maybe you rushed this one to the market prematurely, and didn’t notice the dude rats hitting on the other dude rats.
If you’d like, I can send the unused portion for evaluation and testing. Be careful though—if you get some on you, you may turn into Ned Beatty in those backwoods on the Chattahoochee River.
Let me know!
Thanks.
Jerry
--------------------------------
From: comments@unilever.com
Date: Thu, 6 May 2010 13:17:29 -0400
Subject: Axe Consumer Services Case #: 7540483
Dear Jerry,
Thank you for writing us regarding Axe Deodorant Bodyspray.
The AXE campaign is meant to be a humorous look at the "dating game" and the desire of young men to be noticed by young women. We hope you'll understand the campaign is meant to be an exaggerated example of the wishful thinking of many young men. Keep in mind smelling good is only half the battle; the rest is really up to you.
Sincerely,
Your friends at Axe
-------------------------------------
To: comments@unilever.com
Subject: FW: Axe Consumer Services Case #: 7540483
Date: Thu, 6 May 2010 21:49:38 -0400
Dear Friends at Axe,
I can understand why you artfully dodged the “return the unused portion” option. I can’t say I blame you. This stuff must give off the wrong pheromones. If you get some on you, you’ll be the one attracting all of the dudes.
I accidentally spilled a little on my shorts before having dinner at the local diner. My gosh the phone numbers.
I’m going to keep buying. Clearly this stuff works. If I catch a “hetero” bottle one of these times, I’m gonna be in business.
Thanks,
Jerry
-----------------
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LMAO. The reply from Unilever was actually good. Very funny!
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