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Sunday, July 1, 2012

Post# 266 - 7-Eleven: Happy Free Slurpee Day, Unless You Get There At 9:00.

After a disappointing Slurpee Day, I sent this letter on 7/11/2011.

Dear 7-Eleven

Happy Birthday.  I saw your add on Facebook.  The thought of a free 7.11 ounce Slurpee excited me, Steph, and our two children, Ann and Alfred.

I called home, and told Steph that she should take Ann and Alfred for their free Slurpee.  They refused, stating that "it just wouldn't be the same without our Dad."

I finished my work, hopped into my hot, hot car (92F, heat index of 108F).  I headed home, on my hour commute.  I stopped to run my 8 mile workout because exercise is important.  As I finished that workout, all I could imagine was that icy cold Slurpee.

I headed home.  I said, "Honey, kids, hop in.  Let's go!"  Alfred said, "Dad--shouldn't we eat dinner before having a delicious treat?"  So we ate.

By the time we pulled up at our 7-Eleven at 9PM, we could hardly contain ourselves.  As we walked in, we saw a sign on the door that read, "OUT OF FREE SLURPEES.  SORRY."  We drove to two neighboring 7-Elevens.  Same deal.  I called my friend several towns over--same thing.

This was disappointing.  My kids cried.

Here's the thing.  You ran out of "Free Slurpees, but not "Regular Slurpees."  People were buying Slurpees on Free Slurpee Day.  Let me repeat that, because it sounds so incredibly wrong.

People were buying Slurpees on Free Slurpee Day.

I'm blessed and fortunate to have a job.  It's a good job, an hour away.  I missed out on a lot of my kids' firsts.  Ann's first word.   Alfred's first steps.  Ann riding a two-wheeler for the first time.  Because of me, my whole family missed Free Slurpee Day.

Look, it's not the 7.11 ounce Slurpee.  It's all about being a part of something so much bigger than any one person.  Solidarity.  I had to go to school on Hands Across America Day.  This was going to be my Hands Across America.  Except that you ran out of Free Slurpees.

I'm guessing everyone had a pre-determined number of 7.11 ounce cups, and this quantity corresponded to a pre-determined volume of Slurpee Goop, which corresponded to a set amount that each site was willing to spend for people to have free Slurpees.  To serve one more customer a free Slurpee would be to upset that equation.  But you upset a different equation--that of Customer Satisfaction.

See, every time I drive past or walk into a 7-Eleven, I'm going to think of my crying kids, that sign, and the sight of people were buying Slurpees on Free Slurpee Day.

My advice is this: stock more cups and Slurpee Goop.  If you run out of cups, use other cups.  It's Free Slurpee Day and everyone should be able to enjoy one.



P.S. - I think that the Cheeseburger Big Bite, as it rotates on those greasy rollers, under those hot lamps, looks a little like a glistening turd.  Maybe you should re-think it.  Just trying to help.

Subject: FW: Free Slurpee Day
Date: Tuesday, July 12, 2011, 10:10 AM


We do apologize for the inconvenience.  It sure would help if you could provide the store address, so that we can alert local management.  I would be glad to send you some Slurpee coupons.

Subject: Re: FW: Free Slurpee Day
Date: Tuesday, July 12, 2011, 8:40 PM

Thank you for responding, and also for offering coupons.  And lastly, for taking my Cheeseburger Big Bite comment as constructive criticism.

Here's the deal.  The locations that ran out of free Slurpees that I am aware of are:

1) Allen Road in Brownstown, MI.

2) King Road in Trenton, MI.

3) Biddle Road in Wyandotte, MI.

4) Pennsylvania Road in Riverview, MI.

5-6) Both Northline locations in Southgate.

7) Downtown Wixom, MI.

8-11) Four locations in St. Clare Shores, MI.

Those are just the locations that either my friends or I experienced.  This, to me, suggests that the appropriate action isn't addressing individual stores, but rather, policy change.

If the limiting factor is cups, then stores need more cups.  Break out the Solo cups or those little styrofoam cups.  Or better yet, start handing out Small Slurpees. 

Wouldn't that be better than a bunch of bummed out people leaving empty handed, or being told that they can buy a Slurpee on Free Slurpee Day, the most sacred of all secular holidays?

Thanks again for responding, and for the coupon offer.



Subject: Re: FW: Free Slurpee Day
Date: Monday, August 1, 2011, 8:58 PM

Dear Janey,

I hope my information provided you the leads necessary to apprehend the responsible store owners in this matter, and to deal with them swiftly.  More importantly, I hope it provided enough leverage to implement sweeping changes to the "7-11 Day" policies.

You mentioned coupons for Slurpees.  If you sent them, I didn't receive them.  I'm planning on heading over to my post office to ask some questions.  And I'll know something's up if I see anybody with a blue tongue.

Either way, I feel like I'm on the outside, looking in.  Much like I did on 7-11 Day.


Subject: FW: FW: Free Slurpee Day
Date: Tuesday, August 2, 2011, 11:41 AM

Dear Jerry:

Thanks for your email.  I’m so sorry for the confusion, but you didn’t provide your mailing address when you sent the list of stores in your email dated July 12th.  Can you also provide your full name, as well?

 Sent: Tuesday, August 02, 2011
Subject: Re: FW: FW: Free Slurpee Day

Sorry Janey,

Here goes:

Jerry H.
Subject: RE: FW: FW: Free Slurpee Day
Date: Tuesday, August 2, 2011, 12:24 PM

Thanks for providing your mailing address.  I will send your coupons in
the mail tomorrow as I missed the mail run for this morning.


Subject: Fw: RE: FW: FW: Free Slurpee Day
Date: Saturday, August 13, 2011, 3:24 PM

Dear Janey,
When I was a kid, other kids tried pranking me.  Somebody tried the warm water trick.  Somebody else short sheeted my sleeping bag, which even if it works, isn't that funny.  Somebody else tried giving me a brownie laced with laxatives.  That person, as they waddled toward the restrooms crasping their rear end, learned the lesson of the "old switcheroo."
Don't take this personally.  I never received any coupons.  Maybe they were lost in the mail.  Maybe I'm the butt of somebody's joke.  Maybe I offended some honcho with my constructive criticism about the hot dog shaped cheeseburgers, and he put a halt on the whole operation.  Maybe the person in charge of mailing coupons is the same person in charge of ordering cups on Slurpee Day.  Whatever the case, I feel just like I did on July 11th, when I stood on the outside, looking in.
If I'm supposed to do the switcheroo here, I don't know what that would be.  Would I mail you a Slurpee?  I don't see the irony there.  So I assume this is all a case of Person A giving Person B the envelope to mail, and Person B missing the importance.  Or maybe the envelope fell behind the seat, and will surface in 2015, after the coupons have expired.
I just wanted to express my frustration.  Since I don't know what really happened, I don't know how.  Can you help me?

Subject: Re: RE: FW: FW: Free Slurpee Day
Date: Saturday, August 13, 2011, 5:28 PM
Not sure why you have not received the coupons which I have mailed you. I will resend but you will have to sign for them so I know that you did receive them.
An envelope arrived the next day with five coupons for free medium Slurpees.
Subject: Re: RE: FW: FW: Free Slurpee Day
To: "JaneyAppia" <>
Date: Monday, August 15, 2011, 10:19 PM

They arrived today.  They didn't make me sign for anything.  You can cancel the second shipment. 
Thank you!

The next day, five (5) more free medium Slurpee coupons arrived.
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