the herman letters: Post# 218 - Mountain Dew Pitch Black: The Can Is Mostly Empty

Dear Pepsi Folk,

When I purchased a twelve pack of your “Mountain Dew Pitch Black,” my daughter was with me. Jane is too young to remember the last time this wonderfully grape-flavored Mountain Dew hit the market. With Jane being a “Mountain Dew Superfan,” I promised to save her one.

You see, I drive a rig across the country. I rely on your caffeinated beverages to keep me on the road, and to help me to keep on truckin’. Standard procedure is to load my twelver into the mini-fridge along with a full pound of thinly sliced deli turkey (for samiches) and six breakfast bars. I throw four Milky Way Midnights in the fridge (for snacktime). Once, I accidentally bought the caffeine-free version. Was this some sort of practical joke?

More than caffeine, the beverages give me a goal—something to work toward. Since I get paid on a per-trip basis and need to cover my costs, I drink one per twelfth of my trip. Sometimes that equates to once per 750 miles. Because I was saving the last one, I would skip one of my reward zones.

This past trip, I drove to Boulder and back. By Peoria, my eyes were droopy. I was dreaming. I kept thinking about that last Mountain Dew. It was calling my name. Then I would think of Janey, and I would resist.

When I pulled up by the house, I was beat. My wife, Stephanie, and Janey greeted me right in the street. Lorraine had fried four whole chickens and made homemade mashed potatoes, corn on the cob, and corn bread. What a feast! Jane hugged me for what seemed like a full minute—she missed me. Then, she looked at me, as if to say, “alright, Daddy, where is my Mountain Dew Pitch Black?” I reached into my mini-fridge and grabbed it. As I was handing it off, it felt light. Like almost empty.

Janey ran and cried—she locked herself in the bathroom. She thought I ripped her off. Instead of making sweet, sweet love to Stephanie with a bellyful of chicken, I spent the whole night talking Janey out of that bathroom. My night and my weekend was ruined.

What gives? Is this some sort of cost savings idea? Skimp on one of the twelve cans? Can I expect two if I get the24 pack? It’s not like there was residue in my mini-fridge. None of the cans from the 12-pack was sticky from a leaky can. Don’t they check weight of the packages down at the Pepsi Bottler?

Here’s some info: if a normal can weights 12.25 oz, this one weighs 3.0 oz. The bottom of the can reads “NOV 7 2011 2237HC 05031MI10c” There is a tiny pinhole about 5 mm above the barcode, between the words “INDEPENDENT” and “AUTHORITY.”

If this is some new idea, I think it absolutely stinks. My daughter wrote a story for her class about what a disappointment I was. Right on the front cover, she drew herself with a sad face.

I don’t really know what else I can do for you. This is really messed up.

Thanks for nothing!

Jerry
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On Mon, 7/4/11, noreply@pepsi.com <noreply@pepsi.com> wrote:

Subject: A Message from PepsiCo Consumer Relations 012748087B
Date: Monday, July 4, 2011, 10:00 AM

Dear Jerry,

Thank you for contacting us about the issue you had with one of our products. We're grateful for your assistance in our quality assurance efforts.

I am so sorry that your daughter was so upset about the empty can. I'm sure she realizes that you didn't rip her off and as hard as it is for a child to understand, sometimes things can happen that are out of your control. It sounds like the product leaked out of the can. I'm not sure if that happened at the plant or at the store.

Please know that I've shared the information you provided with the appropriate bottling facility. I've also mailed out a few complimentary coupons for your inconvenience. I was able to get a hold of a Mountain Dew T-Shirt (we only had an adult medium size) for Jane. I sent that too. They should arrive in about a week to 10 days.

I hope this helps with your situation. Thanks for writing and have a great day!!

Fondly,

Dee Dee
Consumer Relations Representative

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{\i DID YOU KNOW ... *** All of Pepsi-Cola’s plastic soft-drink bottles contain an average of 10% recycled plastic, and the average aluminum can contains 40% to 50% recycled aluminum. ***}